


when shadows all start breaking free

by morganoconner



Series: future burning bright [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Background Slash, Brother Feels, Coming Out, Future Fic, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-23
Updated: 2014-11-23
Packaged: 2018-02-26 18:03:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,871
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2661329
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/morganoconner/pseuds/morganoconner
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There's something going on with Dean, and all Sam can do is brace himself for the fallout.</p>
            </blockquote>





	when shadows all start breaking free

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Amberdreams](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amberdreams/gifts).



> For Amber, who is wonderful and deserves all good things.
> 
> I am two years out of practice writing _Supernatural_ , and I haven't seen any of it since mid-season-9 (except for Fan Fiction, from which Marie makes a cameo appearance here). As such, I apologize profusely for any inconsistencies, although I hope there won't be any, given the nebulous future this is set in.
> 
> Amber, I sincerely hope you enjoy this, and thank you for giving me an excuse to dip my feet into this fandom again! I've missed it more than I realized, and I really loved writing this for you. ♥
> 
> Please see the notes at the end for possible spoilery trigger warnings. I don't _think_ there's anything here too triggery, but just in case, better safe than sorry.

It takes a lot to surprise Sam Winchester. A life of hunting will do that to a guy, and even if he's been out of that particular game for a long time now, not much can get him to stop dead in his tracks and have his jaw dropping open.

This, though. This will do it.

His brother's moan rings loudly through their shared apartment, and the one that answers him is softer but just as audible. That's surprising enough, because Dean has practically been living celibate for years now, but for a long moment, Sam thinks he must have misheard because he would swear that the answering voice also sounded _male_.

Sam doesn't doubt that Dean still has secrets he keeps close to the chest, but after nearly fifty years of rather co-dependently living in each other's pockets, there isn't much Sam and Dean don't know about each other. And Sam is sure – he is _damn sure_ – this is something he should have known.

Except he didn't; somehow, despite all the clues he can hear clicking together like puzzle pieces in his brain, he had entirely missed this. And even while he's trying to convince himself that Dean is just watching porn or something, he can't pretend away the too-deep voice that suddenly yells Dean's name, while Dean begs for it _harder_ and _faster_ and the " _Fuck yeah, just like that!_ ", which also happens to coincide with a couple thumps as the bed hits Dean's bedroom wall.

Sam cringes back, the paper bag of groceries almost tumbling out of his hands before he remembers to tighten his grip on it. He hadn't realized Dean at fifty-four would still have that kind of, uh, _stamina_.

This is…awkward.

Well, Sam decides, discretion is definitely the better part of valor. He hefts the bag in his arms, goes back out the front door as quietly as possible, and books it down to the parking lot.

He'll go to the park for a while and read, or maybe put in a few extra office hours at the school, and if Dean asks later, he'll have a story about traffic or grocery store lines or something.

Somehow, he doubts Dean will ask.

*

Later that night, Sam returns home and finds Dean sitting at the counter, looking sleepy and undeniably sated. He has an easy grin stretched across his face, and his eyes are sparkling when they find Sam.

"Have a good day?" Sam asks, setting the groceries on the counter by Dean's coffee.

" _Oh_ yeah," Dean sighs, leaning back and closing his eyes like he's remembering every single minute of it. Sam unsuccessfully tries to smother a cough, but Dean doesn't seem to notice anyway.

Sam's eyes flick down to Dean's chest, where there is an unfamiliar pendant is resting against his thin t-shirt. It looks old, and it looks magical, and Sam is not an idiot. His eyes narrow.

But aside from the guy thing, Dean isn't doing anything he didn't do a hundred times back in their heyday, and he looks happier – more content, more settled, more _together_ – than Sam has seen him in a long time. Also, Sam has a pretty good idea of where that pendant came from, if not what its purpose is. He can probably let it sit for a few hours, at least.

For now, he goes to put the groceries away, jostling Dean as he walks by the way he can get away with by virtue of being the little brother, and if he maybe revels just a tiny bit in Dean nudging him back and grinning up at him with that barely-familiar cheerful expression, that's no one's business but his own.

*

"Okay, Marie, what did you send my brother?" Sam asks in his best no-nonsense tone of voice.

"Um."

Sam sighs, taking off his glasses (they are ostensibly only for reading, but Sam is finding that he needs them more and more for everything else, too) and rubbing at the bridge of his nose. Marie is a good hunter, but her real talent lies in her collection and documentation of magical artifacts, something she started doing straight out of college, along with beginning a lucrative writing career that showcases how far she's come since her days of _Supernatural, the Musical_.

"It was just a small birthday present. It doesn't even do much, and it won't last more than a couple days. Besides, it was Maeve's idea, so –"

"Marie." Sam keeps his voice level. She's a good kid (and she will _always_ be a kid in his mind, never mind that she and her partner are mid-thirties now), and he doesn't want to yell at her, but. "What did you send."

She sighs loudly. "It's just a charm to…lower his inhibitions, a little. We agreed that he's too tightly wound, and he needed to relax a little. Ever since that b –"

"Stop." Sam doesn't want to hear anything about… _that_. Dean's been a mess for years because of the whole thing, and remembering what he went through has a tendency to make Sam want to go out and kill things. "If I get him to take off the necklace, will the spell go away immediately?"

Her silence is answer enough.

Sam sighs. "You said it will wear off soon?"

"Forty-eight hours, tops," Marie promises. "And look, Sam, I'm sorry, we just thought –"

"Yeah, I know. It's not me you're going to have to answer to, though." Sam's not relishing when Dean comes down from whatever high he's on to find out that a friend basically drugged him. There are reasons he's been stone-cold sober for so long now. Reasons he doesn't have sex anymore, reasons he keeps to the apartment as much as Sam will let him get away with it.

He hangs up on Marie with a terse goodbye, mind already racing, trying to figure out how to deal with the fallout.

*

As it happens, Sam it right there when the pendant wears off. He didn't plan it that way – he knows from experience that you can't plan around anything involving magic – and to be honest, given what his brother has been up to most of the last twenty-four hours, Sam's original plan was to avoid the apartment at all costs. But he stops in for some forgotten paperwork at lunch, and Dean is just coming out of his room and is rooting around for junk food in the pantry when he suddenly goes rigid.

It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out what the tension in Dean's shoulders or the tightness of his mouth means, when he turns to face Sam with a wary look in his eyes.

Sam, knowing Dean's…friend is waiting for him in the bedroom, tilts his head toward the balcony off their living room. Dean follows him, looking for all the world like someone getting ready for the beating of their lives.

Sam _hates_ that look. Sam wants to do just about anything to get rid of that look.

When the balcony door closes behind them, Dean immediately stalks to the railing and braces himself against it, knuckles already whitening where they grip the cool metal. Dean is silent for a long moment before he glares at Sam. "What. Happened?" he grits out through teeth clenched so hard Sam is surprised they aren't cracking.

In the face of Dean's undeniable fear and anger, Sam keeps his expression as open, and as calm, as he can. He reaches over and gently taps the pendant Dean is still wearing.

" _Marie,_ " Dean growled, all but ripping the necklace off and staring at it. The magic is gone now, and it's obvious by the way it's lost all the luster it had the last time Sam looked at it.

"I know it won't help to tell you this, but she didn't mean anything terrible by the gesture," Sam says quietly. "She wanted you to relax a little. In her mind, it was just like that time you gave Rachel Davies a bag of weed on her eighteenth birthday." He pauses. "Well, except that Marie wasn't trying to get _herself_ laid. Just you, I think."

Dean's eyes close, and he leans against the railing like it's the only thing keeping him upright. Sam wonders if he's going to be sick.

"Are you okay?" he asks, tentatively placing a hand on his brother's shoulder. When the touch isn't immediately rejected, he squeezes and steps closer. "Dean?"

"I'm fine."

He doesn't sound fine, Sam thinks. He sounds like a man getting ready to face the firing squad, and he also sounds suddenly, unbearably exhausted. Not that any of that is surprising. "I, uh. I know you're not such a big fan of…sex, these days…" He trails off at the incredulous look Dean gave him.

"It's not the _sex_ , Sammy, although yeah, I'd've liked to be in my right fucking mind when that happened." He chokes out a bitter-sounding bark of laughter and scrubs a hand down his face. "Not that it ever would have, if I had been."

"Is it…the guy thing?" Sam feels like he's tiptoeing through a minefield, but it isn't like they can just pretend it didn't happen. Or, well, Dean probably can, but Sam isn't wired that way.

Dean snorts, which is answer enough.

"Look," Sam tries. "You know it's not a big deal, right? I mean, I know Dad was… _Dad_ , and everything, but I never cared about stuff like that. If you're bi, or straight, or gay, or whatever, you're still my brother and I still love you."

"Christ, could you get more Hallmark?" Dean gripes, but Sam is happy to note that some of the tension is draining away from his voice and his shoulders. Not all, but _some_ , which seems like a good start.

"Probably," Sam says with a small laugh. "But I'll try not to. Um. I do have to ask, were you guys…I mean, I know you weren't entirely thinking straight –" Dean snorts again, and yeah, not the best turn of phrase there, Sam. "– _but_ ," he continues doggedly, "were you at least careful?"

Dean rolls is eyes. "Yeah, _Mom_." His shoulders hunch up towards his ears a little and he shrugs. "Brian is…he's a good guy. He wouldn't have let me. He. Yeah, we were careful." He clears his throat a little, looking away.

Sam thinks he remembers Dean mentioning a Brian…the guy who owns the coffee shop Dean goes to sometimes, one of the few places he ventures without Sam practically having to throw him out of the apartment. Dean's been frequenting the place at least twice a week for a couple years now.

Huh.

"That's good," he says, honestly. "And Dean…seriously, man, I'm…I'd be okay with this. If it were to become a thing." At Dean's sharp look, he raises both his hands. "Just saying, okay?"

Dean pauses, still staring hard at Sam for a long time before he finally turns back to his view from the railing. "Yeah, okay," he mumbles. But he also straightens up enough to nudge his shoulder against Sam's, and that's enough.

San knows he'll be okay. They both will.

**Author's Note:**

> Trigger warning: Dean is given something that temporarily lowers his inhibitions and makes him act in a way he normally would not if he was thinking clearly. This also leads to Dean being outed in a way he was not prepared for. All (off-screen) sex is fully consensual and safe beyond that.
> 
> Title comes from Nickelback, which I imagine is where a lot of my titles will come from for a little while because the new album is basically perfect and I've had it on repeat for an entire week. I AM NOT ASHAMED. OR SORRY.


End file.
